Archive for the 'parenting' Category

When the ‘Yes’ does not fool anyone

I’ve written a few posts about our attempts to “find the ‘Yes’” in situations with our children. I had a recent reminder that some of my ‘Yesses’ are still not making the grade.
Z (2 years) has been waking up around 5am for the last few months which Anne & I are finding very challenging. On […]

10 Tips for Reforming Parenting Control Freaks

I admit it. I am still a reforming parenting control freak.
You wouldn’t know it to chat to me. Or by the fact I am into unschooling and trusting my children. But in all honesty it is a constant effort not to “do things for them”, or more often “to tell them or make them do […]

The most Hands On way of being Hands Off

I really enjoyed writing a post a little while ago about “Finding the Yes”.
However i feel motivated to write a little more clearly about this topic given the steady stream of mainstream (and often alternative) parenting commentators talking about how essential boundaries and “just saying ‘no’” are. From Dr Phil right through to personal […]

Sibling Fights and Ditching the Detective

Sibling fights… There are those who intervene at the first sign of trouble. Then those who just “let them work it out” and don’t intervene at all.
My current approach is to intervene when I think I can be of some assistance by facilitatating rather than solving. It involves a clear intention if not a difficult […]

Before I had children…

before I had children I thought sleeping in was waking up after lunch… now I think its getting to 8am
before I had children I wondered what stay at home parents did with all their time… now I wonder what people without children do with all of theirs
before I had children friends called me […]

Finding the Yes

I know it can be hard sometimes.
In fact over the years I’ve been through periods when I thought that “the Yes” have become extinct. They can be slippery buggers – sometimes so small and great at hiding. Its as though you’ve got to feel them first… believe in them… then maybe, just maybe you might […]

Cartoon: Food Freedom

This is so me sometimes
click on the image below to see the full size pic in a new window…

[note: you can reproduce any of these cartoons so long as you: 1) leave a comment or drop me a line to tell me where; 2) include a live link back to www.theparentingpit.com; and 3) […]

Parents as Coach?

Anne & I have recently been reading and implementing coaching techniques for our home business to great effect. We have been using a coaching approach called the GROW model popularised by John Whitmore in his book Coaching for Performance. Although I feel uncomfortable with describing parenting as coaching, I was struck by how this approach […]

After the Fall

SPLAT!
It was the sound of our 21 month old son Z falling from the second step of a step ladder onto the kitchen floor.
A few years ago, if that was M, I probably would have jumped in and scooped her up like I was some pseudo action hero… checking for blood, tears or anything.
That was […]

The Con in Consistency

Let me unequivocally state here and now that consistency is essential, non negotiable and crucial in parenting… if you are going down the behavioural modification road.
The bastion of mainstream parenting, this approach generally has shaping and moulding children’s behaviour into acceptable forms as its primary goal.
Studies show that consistency is crucial to this end. OK, […]