http://theparentingpit.com alternative parenting | conscious living | unschooling Sun, 06 Jul 2008 21:04:42 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3.1 http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-37882 asma Tue, 26 Feb 2008 21:26:25 +0000 http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-37882 a very nice and supporting. a very nice and supporting.

]]> http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-3558 Nyah Conscious Sat, 10 Nov 2007 06:57:45 +0000 http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-3558 Yes I see what you are saying Dawn..absolutetly, it is glorifying the methods a bit, although I have also experienced the power of simply validating the childs wants and how comforting that can be. I have been very much an attachment parent, often "bending over backwards " to please the children, as I had many children from a very young age. To learn that it is ok to say no, and still pacify oneself with the kindness of validating the childs upsetness without emotional attachment was so liberating for me. I am learning that it is ok to ask them to do things even when I know they wont be happy to do them too, thats taken a while. I now realize that sometimes, children do have to do things (well they don't have to, as free will is an absolute, yet the right thing to do is something it is ok to assertively request) but they don't always have to feel happy to do them. I was the sort of mum who would run around and try to do everything for everyone, no longer! recipe for burn-out. And as for always "natural consequences" yes it sure has its place, yet I agree that it could be used unkindly, and yes, life does have a way of teaching us what we need to learn, when we trust it, and trust ourselves and our inner guidance. Thats what I hope to instill in my kids.... Blessings Kind parents! Sistah Nyah I Yes I see what you are saying Dawn..absolutetly, it is glorifying the methods a bit, although I have also experienced the power of simply validating the childs wants and how comforting that can be.
I have been very much an attachment parent, often “bending over backwards ” to please the children, as I had many children from a very young age. To learn that it is ok to say no, and still pacify oneself with the kindness of validating the childs upsetness without emotional attachment was so liberating for me. I am learning that it is ok to ask them to do things even when I know they wont be happy to do them too, thats taken a while. I now realize that sometimes, children do have to do things (well they don’t have to, as free will is an absolute, yet the right thing to do is something it is ok to assertively request) but they don’t always have to feel happy to do them. I was the sort of mum who would run around and try to do everything for everyone, no longer! recipe for burn-out. And as for always “natural consequences” yes it sure has its place, yet I agree that it could be used unkindly, and yes, life does have a way of teaching us what we need to learn, when we trust it, and trust ourselves and our inner guidance. Thats what I hope to instill in my kids….
Blessings Kind parents!
Sistah Nyah I

]]> http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-2456 Dawn Tue, 25 Sep 2007 22:51:57 +0000 http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-2456 This is a nice article, but I have an issue with it as I do with many of the attachment parenting/peaceful parenting books and articles. When examples are given of how to interact with your child, the examples always end easily in children happily playing by themselves...as in "The little girl asked once more to go home and met with her mother’s validation, but not with any change of plans. Once her need for empathy was fulfilled, she stopped crying and played happily the rest of the time." This is not realistic. I practice peaceful and attachment parenting to two spirited two-year-olds. I think it is an disservice to parents to set up this sort of scenario with such an easy and perfect ending. It gives unreal expectations that frustrate parents more and make them feel as if they are doing something wrong. None of this is easy, though I do agree it is worth it. I think a less idealistic picture of these type of parenting would help more people. This is a nice article, but I have an issue with it as I do with many of the attachment parenting/peaceful parenting books and articles. When examples are given of how to interact with your child, the examples always end easily in children happily playing by themselves…as in “The little girl asked once more to go home and met with her mother’s validation, but not with any change of plans. Once her need for empathy was fulfilled, she stopped crying and played happily the rest of the time.” This is not realistic. I practice peaceful and attachment parenting to two spirited two-year-olds. I think it is an disservice to parents to set up this sort of scenario with such an easy and perfect ending. It gives unreal expectations that frustrate parents more and make them feel as if they are doing something wrong. None of this is easy, though I do agree it is worth it. I think a less idealistic picture of these type of parenting would help more people.

]]> http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-645 tonya Fri, 08 Jun 2007 06:21:07 +0000 http://theparentingpit.com/alternative-parenting/surviving-the-toddler-years/#comment-645 wonderful!!!! Thank you. wonderful!!!! Thank you.

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